Attachment, Commitment and a 'highway monkey family'2:14:00 PM
|I scratch your red ass, you scratch mine|
Good Afternoon Sweetlings,
Pray you are keeping warm wherever you are, Nairobi weather is for the strong hearted but I love love it. It is lunch break at school and I wanted to write a note for a blog post I wanted to work on over the weekend and noticed this one was still pending. I began this post early today on my way to school while stuck in traffic at the bypass (Karen to Lenana) and it was actually inspired by a 'highway monkey family' (or are these baboons/chimpanzees someone help me)
So I was watching these animals play by the road, some opting to get into 'vulgar' sitting positions which included showing their red behinds and other parts. What I found really fascinating was how they have a beautiful clan/clique/sisterhood/bro-code thing going on. (The traffic was slow enough for one to do a thesis on them) The more I looked at this clique, the more I thought of my relations and the initial post was on friendship but now the remix is on a little more.
We just had a HEAVY session before lunch on attachment and commitment. I will let you all in on that session in a latter post but it got me reflecting a lot on what we just learnt in relation to my work in mental health and taking it to a personal level and my relations and asking myself,
am I attached or committed to stuff, to my life,
what about with the life partner; are we just attached or are we committed to each other (I know, I just asked the what are we question in a reframed form).
The 'highway monkey family' came to mind and I wondered what I saw in the morning, what was that; attachment and commitment? Do they even think of that? (Yes I know, what do monkeys have to do with it? But yet again, there is always so much to learn from nature)
I took my thoughts even deeper to those of us with mental health conditions; do we get attached or do we commit? Are we capable of commitment? As I said that session was really heavy for me and it made me think about a lot of things. We easily say I have commitment issues but is that something we say casually or something we should seriously consider? I honestly don't have answers to all these questions and one thing the Inner Journey classes at school have taught me, it is ok not to have all the amswers, it is ok to know that we are at a sensing part of your journey. I kinda know things sort of values and/or dreams I am committed to, also have a rough idea about things I am attached to, whether it is good or bad, well that's a sequel post which may also have answers to some of the questions I have raised in this post.
I had written the piece below sometime back and I think in a way it shows what committed friendships look like;
We live in a world where correcting each other is grounds for unfriending, blocking and subtweeting;
So we prefer to walk around on egg shells with plastic relationships to maintain the number of likes on our IG posts and retweets on our twitter updates.
Despite this trend, there are still people out there who'd rather be unfriended, blocked and subtweeted than leave you in darkness.
If you cross paths with someone who is ready to tell you (and be told) uncomfortable things and is ready to be held (and to hold you) accountable as they (you) make a comeback,
Just as on my trip to school I crossed paths with these animals, may you cross paths with some true friends this weekend. People committed to playing with you, telling you if your games aren't good or opting to get into 'vulgar' sitting positions including showing their red behinds with you if covering yours isn't an option.
Sending love and light.